McCain develops campaign slogan: I’m stupid about the economy (satire)


by R J Shulman
Dandelion Salad
featured writer
Robert’s blog post
May 6, 2008

PHOENIX – Taking a page book from President Clinton who ran his successful Presidential campaigns with a sign saying, “It’s the economy, stupid,” Presidential hopeful John McCain has modernized his slogan to read, “I’m Stupid about the Economy.”

“I am combining the campaigning success of the last two Presidents,” said McCain. “Clinton said ‘economy’ and ‘stupid’ in the same slogan and Bush, well he’s just plain stupid. Clinton and Bush got to be President for sixteen years, and by my count if I am in for sixteen years, I’ll leave office when I’m a hundred a forty-seven.” When told that his numbers didn’t add up, McCain said, “I told you with my straight talk that I’m stupid with numbers.”

The latest ABC/Newsweek poll showed that soon after McCain’s announcement of his new “stupid” strategy, his numbers shot up by ten points. “Who knew that being dumb could be so smart,” said a McCain spokesperson.

Barack Obama told a group of wildly cheering supporters in Vincennes, Indiana that he was stupid to go to Reverend Jeremiah Wright’s church, while Hillary Clinton will be running last minute ads in Indiana saying when the phone rings at three AM, that at that time of the morning she will be pretty stupid on the phone. “I am not certain that such an ad will help Hillary,” said Daniel Forsythe, a political analyst for Washington based Flemming and Associates, “as any American knows, right now when the phone rings in the White House, no matter how hard at stupid she tries, Senator Clinton can’t come close to how stupid it gets when the current President answers that phone.”