July 19, 2008
BAGHDAD, Iraq – The capital of this war torn country is getting ready for the big event, the arrival of Barack Obama and his ever growing Posse, which now includes the news anchors from the major television networks.
“Dis tour gonna outdo anything I done,” said rapper Kanye West.
“Forget the east coast rappers versus the west coast rappers,” said record mogul Sean “Puffy” Combs, “the no coast rappers from the Midwest, like Obama is hittin’ everybody upside the head.”
“The bias of the liberal media is astounding,” said John McCain at a rally in Flint, Michigan. “All the reporters are hovering around Obama like he is something shiny and new and all about hope and change instead of coming here to cover me as I tell bad jokes to these out of work auto workers and explain to them that I don’t know anything about the economy. I would just like to get my hands on the idiot who gave Obama the idea to go to Iraq. Why, I’d punch him in the…ooops, I told him to go to Iraq.”
When asked why she was leaving New York to go to the middle east to cover Obama, CBS anchor Katie Couric said, “I want to be there in case they need someone perky, you know, for the video.” Obama’s historic journey to the Middle East is expected to get wall to wall news coverage, except for Fox New, who will continue to run footage of Reverend Wright saying “god-damn America.”