Thank You, Ladies and Gentlemen by Richard C. Cook

by Richard C. Cook
featured writer
Dandelion Salad
Sept. 21, 2008

The purpose of this brief statement is publicly to express my admiration and amazement at the way the Chairman of the Federal Reserve, The Honorable Ben Shalom Bernanke, the President of the Federal Reserve Bank of New York, The Honorable Timothy F. Geithner, and the Secretary of the Treasury, The Honorable Henry M. Paulson, have come together so effectively to solve the financial problems of the United States of America.

After intense deliberation, and with the help of thousands of highly paid economists, accountants, and other professionals on their staffs, these three high officials of our leading financial agencies have devised a plan that is breathtaking in its simplicity, broad in its scope, and non-partisan in its appeal to our worthy representatives in Congress.

They have also served well the President of the United State, The Honorable George W. Bush, and the Vice-President, The Honorable Richard B. Cheney, those two dedicated and hard-working public servants to whom we have entrusted the spirit, the integrity, and the prosperity of our republic.

The three fine men mentioned above have decided to recommend a plan whereby several trillion dollars of bad loans will be subtracted from the books of any number of financial institutions threatened with further bankruptcy, including foreign-owned institutions, and will be added to the books as liabilities or potential liabilities of the United States government.

Even though these debts were incurred by the said financial institutions through horrendous business practices and frequent outright fraud, making them the responsibility of myself, my fellow citizens, our children and grandchildren, and our other posterity in perpetuity, has a devilish touch of whimsical genius about it.

I am sure that our Congress, consisting of men and women who removed all the regulatory safeguards that might have prevented such a debacle, and often were elected to office through campaign contributions made by executives of the financial institutions now in danger of collapse, will immediately ascertain the wisdom of these proposed measures and speedily approve them.

To all those who have so boldly stepped forward in our country’s hour of need, what more can I say, but “thank you, ladies and gentlemen.”

Copyright 2008 by Richard C. Cook

Richard C. Cook is a former U.S. federal government analyst, whose career included service with the U.S. Civil Service Commission, the Food and Drug Administration, the Carter White House, NASA, and the U.S. Treasury Department. His articles on economics, politics, and space policy have appeared on numerous websites and in Eurasia Critic magazine. His book on monetary reform, entitled We Hold These Truths: The Hope of Monetary Reform, will be published soon by Tendril Press. He is also the author of Challenger Revealed: An Insider’s Account of How the Reagan Administration Caused the Greatest Tragedy of the Space Age, called by one reviewer, “the most important spaceflight book of the last twenty years.” His website is at Comments may be sent via email to


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Cook-Richard C.

11 thoughts on “Thank You, Ladies and Gentlemen by Richard C. Cook

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  11. The provision of the bailout not allowing any judicial review is bizarre. What kind of review are they afraid of? The bailout bill seems to allow the Bush administration to use $700 billion to pay any price for any property. It doesn’t seem to make much sense but sure would allow immense thievery by allowing purchase of properties way above their value. It would be a transfer of wealth from the taxpayer to the finance system disguised as buying properties to save them. Is that why they don’t want judicial review?

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