Another report from the slow snail of Justice and Governance in Ireland regarding the vast swathe of crimes against children perpetrated by the people within the Institutions set up by State and Church for the ‘care’ of children has just been published. The BBC reported this here.
I left a comment which formed the basis for this piece.
I spent my childhood in Irish Catholic Boarding Schools, from age five and a half to seventeen, and as a ward of court, was in custody of my relatives. Who were less than empathetic. Let it be know that abuse occurred in peoples homes too, and that much of that activity has been covered up. Thus as a child there was no-one for me to turn to talk to about my experiences.
I grew up believing those experiences, and my shame, were normal. I believed my low self-esteem was my own fault, that I was evil, a sinner and at heart a disgusting, filthy and ugly person, even though I could pass myself off as reasonably affable.
My life has been pretty much ruled and dominated by those experiences and how I ‘adapted’ to them, how I internalised the values of those who abused me, and took on the image they projected on to me as my own identity.
Years and years of unhappiness, dysfunction, insecurity and a nameless rage (for which, for a long I time no target – and that meant I turned the rage upon myself and those close to me) have dogged my life.
I have struggled as best I can to heal, this for myself, and to understand, to fully comprehend the dynamics of abuse operating at such a huge scale, such that it might be classed a societal problem, because the problem is tractable, because the cycles can be broken, and because this should never happen to any child, and because the resolution of which is essential to the future of all human beings.
There is no higher calling on Earth today.
It is the FACT of the intentional and systematic ‘climate pollution’ of our children’s psyches through conditioning processes that is a taboo subject for mainstream society and the ‘greens’ and other movements for change must now address this issue, openly. Vigorously.
Failure to do so will be catastrophic for all of us.
Because abuse is always about POWER. Abuse is always about control. Abusers ‘condition’ those they abuse to accept the abuse as ‘normal’. To maintain that control.
There is a long historical record in writing, of the processes of conditioning, under the guise of education, or child-rearing, or training, that go back millennia, writings that informed the philosophies of dominance that are the basis of this society. The cycles of abuse go deep.
I am encouraged that the issue is being looked at, today, and in my own lifetime, and not least by the victims and their families, and empathetic researchers. Much research in these areas has been undertaken, and much is known, far more than is in practice through state sponsored projects, such as education, health , culture and ‘spreading democracy’.
I am less encouraged by Government action on these issues. Slow, unwilling to respond to victims with the speed with which they responded to the abusers, in this case, The Christian Churches. That they defend the likes of leaders who start wars should come as no surprise. That our Government opposes fiercely any attempts by ordinary folk to arraign war criminals is typical.
There are more incidents beyond the abuse of children, that litter our society, that are tied up in how a society treats children.
The philosophy a society has in this regard must be examined for any false or corrosive assumptions. Conditioning must be acknowledged as a corrosive force. And ceased.
And that is the only path which I as a survivor deem plausible if we as a society are to honour all children, for all time. It is time, well past time actually, to clean up our collective and centralised acts.
Expectations of every child
The expectations of the natural child are to be loved, to be recognised as a unique being, to be seen as a valid being with feelings and sensings that no one need fear or challenge. The natural child expects to meet competent adults who know what they are doing, who are integrated in harmony with the environment, who have mastered their own being and who behave with a deep respect. The natural child expects to explore freely and to learn about the world he/she is born into. The natural child expects to be able to learn from his oe her own experiences,and from older children, as much as the adults. To the extent that these inherent expectations are met or not, and to the extent that the natural child is coerced or not, these factors will determine the psychological balance of the child and of course the adult the child grows into. And an adult world that does not meet those expectations is the result of those adults having not met with their inherent natural expectations. For most this process is unconscious, and thus the cycles are repeated and as the saying goes ‘ we do not learn from history’…. Well then, enough is already far too much. Start now. You can explore the nature of adverse systemic conditioning with these resources : Alice Miller www. alice-miller.com David Smail http://www.davidsmail.freeuk.com John Taylor Gatto http://www.johntaylorgatto.com John Holt http://www.en.wikipedia.org/wiki/ John_Holt_(educator) Paulo Freire http://www.en.wikipedia.org/wiki/ Paulo_Freire You can explore these themes with your heart, with a ruthless self honesty and by talking to and really listening to very young children …. ideology is of no use here, and neither is religion. Break the cycles, see through your conditioning, only you can do the work that must be done for free your mind and your heart.