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Sent to DS from James at ChrisBunny.
Update: May 7, 2010
More from James:
Please donate your old pantyhose to the Gulf Coast oil disaster cleanup, right now; shave your head and donate the hair! Our goal is to carry a 3 room apartment U-haul from NYC to Gulf Shores 7 days from now.
In order to keep what we have up here, we need to protect what is at stake on the Gulf Coast. It’s very simple, email me at email@example.com, tell me you will donate washed hair clippings from your head, from your favorite salon, and washed pantyhose from your ass and the asses of your friends. We will come pick it up. Simple as that!
We need hair and pantyhose enough to fill a truck, and we need it now! 347-228-5783
Everyone you know who would be willing to give washed hair clippings to the Gulf Coast oil spill cleanup needs to know we’re organizing with a group in Gulf Shores to make hair booms that will soak up oil as it approaches the coastal areas. We have only a few days to make a difference in just a small stretch of the gulf. Please contact me directly for details about how you can take part. This won’t cost anyone a dime, but you may be able to save a chunk of the Gulf of Mexico!
Hair booms are made of washed hair from your salon, free of trash hopefully, and stuffed into pantyhose to make long strands of super absorbent oil booms. They can be washed and reused as well. Many of the booms currently deployed are made from a petroleum-based product which seems a little silly right? The hair you usually throw away can save critter’s lives and a precious ecosystem. Please help! firstname.lastname@example.org
It’s true, most of the time I like animals more than people, with animals I know where I stand. The predators that are bigger stronger and faster than me usually want to eat me. The little ones, well, they just want to get out of my way.
But what happens when that’s thrown out of balance? That’s what people call politics!
The Valdez is happening now but on a potentially much larger scale as an unknown amount of oil is surging into the Gulf of Mexico with only a hopeful plan to stop it. Everyday more sand and oil are pumped through those pipes, and with the erosion from the force of all that effluvial muck the pipes could potentially give way to a much larger hemorrhage.
Think about it, nearly three-quarters of all US waterfowl – and all its 110 species of migratory neo-tropical songbirds – use Louisiana’s three million acres of wetlands to rest or nest. Do you watch birds flying north in the early spring from your roof or fire escape. Do you listen to the morning songbirds in the trees? Do you go upstate to watch the herons stalk about the giant reservoirs?
In March of 1989 fishermen were readying themselves for the herring fishing season. This would be followed a few months later by the salmon fishing season in a normal year. After the Exxon Valdez ran aground on Bligh Reef and spilled its 11 million gallons of crude oil, nothing was normal.
Many, if not virtually all, of the fishermen in Prince William Sound were immediately put to work fighting the spreading oil. The fishermen knew their local waters like only local fishermen typically do. A shift in wind or tide might influence the spread of oil in ways only local knowledge could predict. The fishermen also knew how to handle heavy gear. They commonly set and retrieve long, weighted nets full of fish using state of the art hydraulic winches and other gear. This experience put them in good stead when they were asked to set, tow and retrieve oil containment booms to corral the oil.
We are making those booms, for those fishermen, here in New York City.
In the aftermath of Exxon’s 11-million-gallon oil spill in March 1989, U.S. news media described an Alaskan coast with countless dead animals, decimated plant life, and a massive black blanket covering nearly 1,100 miles of shoreline. But within a few months, a different story gained currency, as reports out of Prince William Sound took on a friendly and forgiving tone. National media began to focus on the damage not done by Exxon’s blunder, heralding Big Oil’s efforts to preserve Alaska’s environment. Out of the jaws of catastrophe, Exxon snatched a news spin increasingly to its liking.
This is already happening, but we have a larger voice now and we must use our voice to make a difference.
During one week in September 1989, the American people learned via cover stories in Newsweek and U.S. News & World Report (both 9/18/89) that the oil spill off the Alaska coastline wasn’t so bad after all. As U.S. News reported, ‘The sublime beachscapes of Prince William Sound remain startlingly beautiful” despite the “image” of ecological disaster in one of the worlds most pristine areas. The very premise of U.S. News & World Report’s cover story–”The Disaster That Wasn’t”–dismissed the seriousness of the spill, and praised Exxon’s poorly organized and haphazardly executed “cleanup” effort.
Slick Coverage of the Exxon Valdez Spill: Unreliable Sources
Now, there are dispersal chemicals being spray, and 40 foot tall rusty containment units being built, none of those provide guarantees. They are as much placebo as that spin from so long ago!
We’ll take your tired old pantyhose, washed of course, and stuff it full of hair. Then we’ll soak up as much of that BP oil as we can. If you want to donate please email me at email@example.com. And please send this to your friends.
We can do something. Help us get the word out!